PSK 2006

Here in the City of Angels, not all are angels like myself. No, our fair city is home to some fairly sketchy industries. Take Hollywood, for example - you just know that Ben Affleck is sketchy. And then there's the shipping port of Long Beach - totally sketch. But the most infamous industry of all resides in the Valley: pornography (shudder).

Thankfully, our proximity to such an iniquitous industry does have its benefits. Like Porn Star Karaoke! Now, I know what you're thinking: what gives porn stars the right to defile a squeaky clean, family-friendly activity like karaoke? But come on - everyone's job is stressful. Who among us hasn't needed to cut loose after a stressful day of facials and lesbian clinchers? And why shouldn't porn stars be allowed to embrace their inner chanteuse? Sardo's in Burbank agrees, so they host PSK every Tuesday.

I've been meaning to go for a long time, but it wasn't until last Tuesday that I finally made it. How was it? Awesome. Obviously, karaoke is always fun, but even more fun is the PSK guessing game: Porn Star or Not Porn Star? The women in skimpy clothes pictured here who are busy making love to the camera (OK, not my camera) are not playing very hard. Even in LA, you don't normally see this much silicone. Porn stars!

But then there are the normally dressed, attractive women. They know how to make the game tough; are they porn stars? Maybe, maybe not. They could just be there for the karaoke. Is it offensive to ask? ("Uh... didn't I see you in Forrest Hump?") Personally, I think that should be a compliment.

And the unattractive girls? You figure they've got to be pornstars. Probably really dirty ones.

Highlight of the night: my picture with Lori Lust (link extremely NSFW, but check out the "best body in the industry" if you can). She gave me a signed copy of her latest "cover" (which is actually one of those crappy free magazines you see at street corners, next to LA Weekly) and her business card, which says she's available for parties. Hmmm, my birthday is coming up....

So, if you're ever bored on a Tuesday night, I highly recommend the PSK. It's got something for everyone: karaoke, booze, and scantily dressed women.

And for the ladies who aren't interested in porn stars? Well, at least you'll get to check out the professional porn photographers, who all bear an uncanny resemblence to this guy: